Tainted

Today was my husband’s BBQ birthday party. It was (emphasis on WAS) the perfect day. We were surrounded by friends, good food, and great music. But it will forever be tainted for me. It will always be the day that Mae fell in the pool.

She was sitting on the step of the jacuzzi and I was sitting there watching her while chatting with a friend. I turned my head for just a moment and when I turned back, there she was on her stomach, flailing. I pulled her out as quickly as possible. Of course she cried and I was strong and told her it was scary but she was just fine. And she was. In just a minute she was her old, happy, independent self running around again having fun.

But I am a mess. How could I have turned my head even for just a second? What if I looked away for longer than that? What would have happened? This incident made me even more aware (and absolutely freaked out) of how precious life is. I have been crying ever since. I feel like the worst mom. Any words of advice or similar experiences?

8 Random Things or Habits About Me

I’VE BEEN TAGGED!! I have only been blogging for a week, and I have been tagged. Thank you so much Amanda for making me feel welcome in this new computer world I have entered. So here I go, excitedly answering the 8 random things and or habits about me meme.

1. I eat my pizza in layers, with a fork. First I peel off the cheese and toppings and eat them first. Then I delicately scraped off the top layer of the bread and enjoy. Lastly, I eat the bottom layer of the bread and the crust. It’s the only way I can eat pizza. What fun it is see the look on people’s faces when they watch a grown woman “play” with her food. This crazy way of eating is not limited to pizza. You should see what I do a Kit Kat Bar.
2. When I was in high school and for some time after, I worked at Disneyland as a parade performer. My first parade I was in was the Main Street Electrical Parade. I also performed in the Christmas, Lion King, and Hercules Parades.
3. I love MTV reality shows. I know, I know…..I am terrible. My two favorites are Laguna Beach and the Hills, which I have seen every episode of every season. So sad! My husband wishes he could cancel MTV without getting rid of his favorite channels.
4. I have this horrible habit of picking my lips. Sometimes I use my fingers but most of the time I use my teeth. My mom yells at me all the time to “STOP” or I am going to get cancer. I am not sure if she has any factual evidence that this will happen or if she is just trying to scare me into not doing it all. But this tactic has not worked. My husband took over the “STOP” job when we got married and he has been unsuccessful in halting this behavior. I don’t even realize I am doing it until I am yelled at. Man, I am doing it right now. I think it helps me think.
5. One of my biggest pet peeves is lateness. I hate being late. I am never late. If I am late then something is terribly wrong. The worst thing of it all is that I come from a family of LATES and so does my husband. I am constantly annoyed because everyone I know is late. Among the top LATES in our family is my sister and my husbands oldest sister. Yeah, yeah they both have a lot of kids (my sister has 3 and his has 6) but come on, people! Stop being late!!!!
6. I daydream every second about owning a bigger house. I want one back in the city where I grew up with a big yard and a swimming pool. I would have a BBQ every weekend and bake yummy delicious treats (if you can call rice krispiy treats baking). But I live in CA where a million dollar house is considered cheap. So for now I am going to have to be content with my modest townhouse and continue throwing BBQ’s at my father-in-law house (while he is away, hehe!)
7. Dirty dishes in the sink drive me crazy. As soon as dinner is over, everything must be washed and put directly in the sink or I will LITERALLY GO NUTS! Sometimes my husband will offer to do the dishes……in a few minutes. But NO!! It must be done RIGHT AWAY! I will not rest until the dishes are clean.
8. Wow, really? 8 random things? I am not sure I am able to come up with one more. Hmm. Ok, here is one that’s not so interesting. My favorite movie is the Pirate Movie. I used to watch it at least once a day in high school. Now it is more like once a year (which happens to be today). The two major stars in it are Kristy McNichol and Christopher Atkins. Such a cheesey movie yet I love it. I love the mushy love songs the hilarious dialog. Classic!

Since I have only been blogging a week, I am not sure I have earned the right to tag anyone. But if there are any new bloggers out there, I would love to learn 8 random things and or habits about you.

Beach Day! Fun?

I am one of the lucky ones to grow up in Southern California, just a few miles from the beach. When I was a kid, the beach was my favorite place to be. My cousins and I would body surf and boogie board all day long, only returning to our towels on the sand to eat lunch. Then it was straight back into the water until our parents forced us out. Some of my greatest memories are those from the summer beach days with family and friends.

So of course, I wanted to share my love of the beach and the ocean with my daughter. I dreamt of building sandcastles, screaming gleefully together as the icy waves crashed against our legs, and digging for sand crabs as the waves retreated back to the sea. I looked forward to her smiling face and glowing eyes I would capture on film and be able to enjoy forever.

But this is all I got………

I only got one good photo of Mae smiling! And she was on my lap....not touching the sand!!

On Sunday, my family headed to the beach for a family fun day. Mae was less than thrilled!! As soon as her chubby little toes touched the sand, a piercing scream escaped her lips. She cannot stand the sand touching and clinging to her feet and hands. She spent the whole day on a blanket with a grimace on her face.

On the way home, I wondered to myself how I could possible be raising such a prissy, beach HATER. Then I got to thinking. Lugging all the beach necessities to our spot on the sand and back with a screaming child was SO not fun! While driving, I tried my hardest not to move my toes because they felt dirty, dry, and sandy. Then I tried to run my fingers through my hair and realized it was tangled and salty, EWWW!! In this moment it hit me. I really DO NOT like the beach! I am raising a daughter who dislikes the beach because I HATE the beach….and I hate to feel dirty and sandy! What has happened to the frolicking kid inside me? It has been lost, and I fear it is lost forever. I am sorry Mae for being this seaside loathing role model.

To You Mae

Tonight, all of the 19 month you, sat lazily on my lap while finishing the first viewing of Cinderella. Together we watched; you for the first time and me, a refresher of a movie that was a favorite from my childhood. You enjoyed every last minute and seemed quiet disappointed when the credits slowly rolled up the screen. I turned the television off. Now the only noise in the house was that of Daddy in the kitchen cleaning shrimp and the dogs wrestling beside us. I gently placed your head on my shoulder. It remained there for a couple of minutes, but then quickly popped us. You were trying to resist the sleepiness overcoming you. I began to hum a song from Cinderella to lull you to sleep, but you decided to hum right along with me. A grin emerged on my face. I again laid your head on my shoulder. The rocking chair rhythmically squeaked beneath us. The only thought in my mind was that there was no place I would rather be, no place could compare to this! You still resisted sleep. You took your small, fragile finger and humorously placed it on my nose, while clearly saying, ‘nose.’ Your tiny pointer than found its way to my cheek, and I said, ‘cheek.’ Every few seconds a new facial feature was touched and I identified each one. Finally, you found your way to my eyebrow. What fun that word was to your ears. Each time you touched an eyebrow and I would say, “eyebrow,” a deep belly laugh escaped from your lips. Over and over again, this game would repeat and each time you would giggle a sweet, innocent giggle. Finally, the sleepiness was too strong to fight. Your head began getting heavier and heavier on my shoulder. Your breathing got deeper. You were finally asleep. I knew I could place you gently into your crib without waking you, but I was enjoying this cuddle so much I continued rocking. I know this time with you, this time when you enjoy snuggling with mom, will not last forever. With each passing a day, you become more and more independent. I must savor these sweet moments!

The Newbie

This is my first blog, my first post, my first try at this Mommy Blogging thing. I have been reading blogs for quite some time and am somewhat obsessed. I have been thinking about starting my own for quite a while. In fact, everyday I think to my self, "Hey, if I had a blog I could write about this." But I have been too scared! As I am sure you will find out, I am a HUGE CHICKEN!! I am the girl who stands behind watching others dare to live and try new things. I dream about becoming one of those people. So I am about to make a huge leap out of my norm! Here it goes.

Exactly 10 months and fourteen days ago, my whole world flipped right side up (I never even knew it was upside down). This was the day my daughter was born. Before her birth, my husband and I vowed that having a child would not change our lives. We would still go out to eat, see movies, stay up late, watch South Park, hang out with our friends, etc. You wouldn't believe how many people laughed in our face and told us to "just wait." But we truly, whole heartedly believed that we would remain who we always were. Then Mae graced us with her presence. Her LOUD, beautiful presence! Let's see. We have seen about three movies in the past year and a half, I have a date with my pillow each night at 9pm, and unless our friends have kids too we havent's seen much of them. Now, I am not complaining because I love to spend most every non-working (yes, I am a working mom) moment with her. But this just proves that having a baby DOES change your life. I have seen the error of my ways! But until it happens to you.....right?


Here is my Mae. The fiesty Italian side.













And the sweet side!